I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
