had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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