Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize