drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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