Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
