Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
