Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
