Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I intend to get homeless drunk
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
is it fun? or sober?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
