i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
