i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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