She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
