went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
