I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
