ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
No I am not eating basil off your cock
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
