Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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