I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
