Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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