Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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