I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
