she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Randomize
