is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Randomize
