I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
