coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
