so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
