singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
