we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
