we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
