whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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