I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize