went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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