i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
