The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
