ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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