SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize