I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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