When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
