omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
