do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
