I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
In other news, I just burned my penis
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Randomize
