Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
