can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I still have a little drunk in my system
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
