if you like me you must not know who I am
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize