we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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