theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
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