Where is the hickey?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
