do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
