We got so high we made milksteak
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
