Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
