you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
