Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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